It is worth noting that it may take a few sessions to build up the rapport and trust before deeper work begins.
You can view our counselling fees before deciding whether to begin.
You may find it difficult to feel good about yourself, even when things seem to be going well. Mistakes can feel like proof that you are inadequate, while achievements bring only temporary reassurance. You might compare yourself with others, question your decisions, or feel pressure to keep proving your worth. Self-esteem issues can show up in how you think about yourself, handle everyday situations and relate to others.
Being habitually hard on yourself: Dwelling on mistakes, or speaking to yourself in ways you would never speak to someone you care about.
Feeling that you are never enough: Even when you do well, you quickly focus on what you could have done better.
Depending on approval: Praise from others bring relief, but criticism, disagreement or a lack of reassurance can leave you in doubt.
Comparing yourself with others: Other people’s achievements, appearance or relationships make you feel inferior or behind in life.
Holding yourself back: You avoid opportunities, or trying something new because you fear failure or judgement.
Putting your needs aside: You find it difficult to say no, set boundaries or ask for what you need.
Feeling insecure in relationships: You may assume you are at fault, worry about being rejected, or tolerate hurtful treatment because you doubt you deserve better.
Dismissing your strengths: You brush off compliments or attribute your successes to luck, while treating setbacks as evidence of personal inadequacy.
Self-esteem counselling offers space to explore how you see and treat yourself, and work towards a steadier sense of self-worth.
Understand your self-critical patterns
Recognise the situations that trigger self-criticisms, the beliefs behind your reactions, and how criticism, comparison or pressure to achieve keep these patterns going.
Develop a fairer view of yourself
Learn to recognise strengths and difficulties without turning them into sweeping judgements about who you are.
Responding differently to mistakes and feedback
Develop ways to learn from mistakes or receive feedback without treating it as a verdict on your worth.
Expressing your needs and setting boundaries
Practise sharing your preferences, asking for support and saying no. Explore the guilt or fear that may arise when you give your own needs more consideration.
Building trust in yourself
Take manageable steps towards decisions, conversations or opportunities you tend to avoid. Where specific skills need developing, we can work on those too, without equating a learning need with personal inadequacy.
Knowing that you are being too hard on yourself does not always make it easier to stop. Counselling can help you understand what drives these patterns and practise different ways of responding.
Self-esteem is how you see and value yourself as a person.
For many people, how you value yourself becomes highly conditional: you feel okay only when you’re achieving, being useful, or being approved of. The good days depend on results, and one mistake or one cold reply can undo them.
A healthier sense of self-esteem allows you to recognise both your strengths and limitations without treating every difficulty as a judgement of your worth. You can take responsibility, develop skills and learn from mistakes while still treating yourself with respect.
It is often related to other self concepts such as self-worth, confidence, self-acceptance and self-respect.
Believing you deserve love, respect and kindness regardless of your achievements.
Trusting your own judgement and abilities.
Holding youself with dignity, which allows you to set appropriate boundaries and not tolerate mistreatment.
Accepting both your strengths and flaws without harsh excessive judgements.
Self-esteem difficulties tend to follow a cycle.
TRIGGERS
Criticism, comparison or feeling rejected can bring self-doubt to the surface.
CORE BELIEFS
The triggers are interpreted through beliefs such as “I’m not good enough”, making a difficult experience feel like evidence of your inadequacy.
DIFFICULT FEELINGS
Shame, anxiety, sadness or disappointment can arise as you worry about what the experience says about you and how others might see you.
HARSH SELF-TALK
You blame yourself, dwell on perceived shortcomings or focus on what you “should” have done, making it harder to respond to yourself fairly.
SURVIVAL RULES
You feel you must meet certain conditions to be acceptable such as keeping others happy, avoiding mistakes or always being useful.
COPING RESPONSES
You may please others, withdraw, avoid challenges or push yourself harder to reduce the risk of criticism, failure or rejection.
HOW THE CYCLE CONTINUES
These responses may bring temporary relief, while leaving the belief that your worth depends on meeting certain conditions unchallenged.
A safe, inclusive and affirming space where people of all backgrounds; race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, age, and ability are all welcomed.
Our counsellors hold Master's degrees in Counselling and are accredited by the Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC).
Counselling shaped around you and your priorities.
If you are unsure if counselling or a particular counsellor is right for you.
Consider seeking counselling for self-esteem issues when they start to negatively impact your daily life, relationships, or mental well-being;
Self-esteem issues often overlaps with depression, anxiety, perfectionism and past trauma, and it can be hard to tell them apart yourself. You don’t need to work it out before reaching out. We’ll explore what you’re experiencing in the first conversation and, if something else is going on, help you find the right support.
Whether counselling is the right approach for your self-esteem issues depends on your personal needs, struggles, and your present comfort level with seeking help.
You don’t have to be in crisis to seek help—therapy is also for growth and self-improvement.
If you are unsure about counselling, you may consider other options such as;
You and your counsellor will explore what has brought you to counselling, how self-esteem concerns affect your life, and what you would like to change.
Number of sessions needed do vary. Some may notice a shift within 7 to 8 sessions, particularly if they’re working on one specific pattern. Longer-standing patterns, or ones tied to early experiences, usually take longer.
Your counsellor will suggest a rough plan after the first conversation and review it with you as you go. Regular sessions are typically scheduled, allowing for ongoing support and monitoring of progress.
It is worth noting that it may take a few sessions to build up the rapport and trust before deeper work begins.
You can view our counselling fees before deciding whether to begin.
Yes. What you share in sessions is kept private and confidential. The usual exceptions are where there’s a serious risk of harm to you or someone else, or where disclosure is required by law.
Depending on your readiness, you can start with one of the four options below
Exploring our Counsellors Profile
Take a look at our counsellors’ profile and consider if either of them can offer the support you are looking for.
Asking questions about the process
Feel free to reach out to us directly if you have any questions. We can be reached via Whatsapp @ +65 98181963 or send us an email via the button link below.
a free 20 minutes consultation
If a brief conversation helps, meet with the counsellor of your choice to decide if she will be a good fit.
Arrange for a session
Once you are ready to decide, arrange your 1st session via Whatsapp, fill up our appointment booking form, or simply call us. Sessions are available in-person and online.
The self-assessment tool provided here for a quick evaluation of self-esteem can offer insights into your experiences and symptoms, but it is intended for informational purposes only and are not a substitute for professional, medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
If you are experiencing significant distress, mental health challenges, or have concerns about your well-being, please seek guidance from a qualified mental health professional.
Your mental health is important.
If you or anyone you know are in need of immediate help, or facing a life-threatening situation, call 995 or go to the nearest hospital A&E.
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or need immediate emotional support, contact Samaritans of Singapore (SOS):
24-hour hotline: 1767
24-hour CareText via WhatsApp: 9151 1767